Thursday, May 20, 2010

What We Can Learn From...

Okay, let me talk about something a lot of you may find 'cringe-worthy' If you are not interested in male/male love then please don't read any further. Cool?

Here we go then:

So, as all of you who know I write male/male romance, have done since I was first published. A lot of you may be thinking what's the appeal of two men showing each other their affection. Well, to put it simply, the answer is just that. Men showing affection/emotion. Something a lot of women want from their man but just don't get it because he's too macho or some shit like that. What's wrong with a man just hugging someone for the sake of it? What's wrong with a man kissing his son to show him how proud he is? What's wrong with a man doing chores around the house to let his wife know that he sees her as an equal? Nothing. That's what.

Actually, even gay p*rn is completely different to straight p*rn in the way that when the men 'do it' there is lots of kissing, hugging and affection shown toward each other (unless the purpose of the video/pictures are for a different nature, like master/slave stuff). I admire gay p*rn in a way that it's in complete contrast to most straight stuff where the woman is an object. Why should a woman be an object? Why can't a man kiss her like they do in the gay films? In fact, a lot of people in the straight community could learn a lot from what the gay community get up to.

Writing male/male romance is such a joy because I get to see the inner side of what makes a man. Being a man myself I know that we are emotional creatures contrary to popular belief and cultural barriers that have been built up since we climbed down from the trees. One famous saying goes: "You make love to a woman and you have sex with a man". I can't remember who said that, but suffice it to say, I disagree. I think that no matter who you're with, you make love to them. Kiss them...a lot. Treat them as equal. Treat them how you would like to be treated. You'll go far :-)

Oh, and watch some gay p*rn. You may be surprised.


MK Mancos/Kathleen Scott/Kate Davison said...

Beautiful sentiments, Mark. Great post. Though I don't write full m/m romances I do have gay and bi characters in some of my books who are secondary characters. I think one of the hottest scenes in one of my stories is a simple gesture where one man starts to take the hand of another to keep him from leaving after a disagreement. It is the first "touch" between them and the scene is fraught with conflicting emotions. (The one man is mourning the recent death of his lover.) - I never meant to write these characters so deeply, but they were so compelling to me as people that I had to. I love them, and I love the romance building between them, no matter how complicated it might make it for them.

However, that said. I don't think you see this in only m/m romance. I make my heroes tough and macho, but with their chosen heroines they are achingly tender and loving.

And yes, my heroes on occasion do cry. They are supposed to be human for crying out loud. I try to make them as much as possible.

Will I ever write a full m/m novel? Well, I'll never say never.

Rock on!

Tierney O'Malley said...

Kat, I think all of my heroes are crybabies. Kidding aside, I like writing the soft side of my heroes. Like you said they are supposed to be humans.

Mark, I've never tried reading straight m/m but it doesn't mean I'm against it. I've had gay friends since high school and am still in contact with them. I even saw Danny during the gay parade on television and shouted, "there's my friend." I write my genre Contemp erotic romance because it is what makes my heart race. This is what I love and am sure you write your genre because it is what you enjoyed doing. Keep going. We live in this wonderful world because we are all different. Proud of you, Mark.



Mark Alders said...

Thanks guy's for your comments. Really appreciated :-)

Chocolate all round, my shout!



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