How To Put on a Condom

This is the video that has spurred on today's post. Click here to view it. Please, it is NSFW (not safe for work) so yeah, don't watch this one around anyone who will tell on you :-)

Now, the video features the talents of one Brent Corrigan (a very popular p*rn star) promoting safe sex by demonstrating how to put on a condom properly. Sure, a simple thing, but ever so important in this day and age. Let's put aside the fact that Brent engaged in unsafe sex at the tender age of 17 and that he's only just realised that safe sex is the way to go. All his new video's now contain guys wearing condoms.

But are they still sexy?

That is the question, isn't it? I mean, in writing, does unsafe sex turn you off? Do you think of the consequences for the characters when they engage each other in an unsafe way? Sure, I think if you are writing realistic romance, as in modern day guy meets guy/girl, then yes, condoms would be warranted. But what if you write fantasy or science fiction? Would having sex with a shape-shifter even require a condom?

Okay, food for thought, but let's get back to the crux of the issue. The p*rn industry wants to create a fantasy. They want to have perfect bodies slapping together, and putting on condoms (to them) gets in the way. It dilutes the fantasy, if you will.

I think that if you love someone and want to be with them, then safe sex is the way to go. It shows you care on a far deeper level than just lust or fantasy or whatever. Then again, that's not what we watch p*rn for, now is it? Actually, it's not why we read erotic books either. Well, I don't anyway. Real life is--well, real life and reading a book is an escape, just like watching a video.

I know I may get into trouble here for saying such a thing, but I have put up a challenge to myself. My next scene will feature a condom in a really sexy way, you just wait! *grin* After all, a good writer, like a good producer, can make anything possible. Yep. Even make a condom sexy. Brent has done it, so yeah, the gauntlet has been thrown down and I accept.

Connecting with Writers and Readers: An Introvert Living Life As An Extrovert

I try. Really I do. Writers can hide behind their keyboards but once the book is out, we really need to push the introvert aside and let out inner lion roar. Uh..yeah, right, you say. I saw an awesome presentation at my local RWA chapter by Dawna Rand. She's my friend on Facebook if you want to friend her and pick her brain or have her speak at your next workshop. She was AMAZING. She placed colored note cards on our tables and told us to find all the other notecards in the room that shared our color so we could meet new people and network. It was wonderful. I met new writers and some people who just might open up new doors for me as a writer. Networking really is important. And I hate it. Dawna said the only thing she likes about cocktail parties are the cocktails....lol. Me too but those parties are great for networking. We should all force ourselves to speak to others, ask questions and be a good listener.

I'm going to force myself to be a little more extroverted right now and extend an open invitation for writers AND readers to have their own day on my personal blog at http://alishapaige.blogspot.com. I'd love to hear about your upcoming releases, the writing world in general or what you love in a book from readers. Send me any other ideas you have as topics and let me know the date you'd like to blog (except for Tuedays). I'm open to anything. I would really love to connect with more writers and readers. Please shoot me an email at alishapaigewilson@yahoo.com.

Have a great Tuesday!
~Alisha

The Movies I Love to Love

I am pretty much a movie addict. But I guess if I have to be addicted to something, movies are a nice benign way to go. Just like books there are certain genres I like more than others, but I am willing to try watching just about anything as long as it has an engaging plot and tight script. (I'm very picky about script and plot holes.)

Then there are the movies I watch over and over again. They are the background noise when I write- on the occasions when I decide I need a bit more company than just the stereo playing. No matter if the movie is a classic noir, or a adaptation of an Austen or Dickins novel, if the story has dragons or magic, or space battles and Vulcan ears, they all have the same thing in common - they transport me to another place. Of course some of these movies I've seen so many times I can play a Rocky Horror on them and recite all the dialogue. But that's fine, that familiarity also allows me to tune out great portions of the movie into background only.

It's nothing on a long afternoon when I'm busy typing away to play the LOTR triology, or the original Star Wars saga back-to-back. Sometimes I'll go for A & E's version of Pride and Prejudice, or the BBC rendition of Our Mutual Friend. Sometimes I'll go fun and watch the Mummy movies.

I find my favorites are period pieces. I have to admit a fondness for anything that is wrapped in chain mail or corsets and relies heavily on court politics. This doesn't mean they have to reside in the real world. It can be plucked from the shores of some distant land, or a time before time. I really don't care. There is just something about the costumes that make me swoon. (Really, I think swooning is a dying art form.)

I'll admit, action/adventure will sometimes turn my head. The Transporter series, (ooo Jason Statam, now there's something to swoon about). Or maybe I want something with Jet Li. (Hot Asian dude, oh, yeah I'm soooo there!)

There there are the series I'll just put in DVD's for and watch. My favorite - hands down is ST:DS9. Solid writing, awesome plot lines, visually impressive. It's got everything. Including Avery Brooks as the captain - I mean, how can you go wrong!

I hear a lot of writers saying they can't work with the television going or the stereo blaring. I'm not that sort of girl. If I really need to concentrate, then I might forgo the tube, but not usually. I know my limits of stimulation and I know when I need something to fill in the void of null sound around me. Watching my favs is just like having a steaming mug of tea and curling up to visit with old friends.

What are some of your favorite movies?

-Kate

Sorry for my Absence

* Contest below*

I'm sorry I haven't blogged in forever. Things have been crazy in my life, problems at home with my oldest son and the final culmination coming with my little brother (he just turned 19) almost dying from a drug overdose. None of us even knew he was using drugs and huffing. So, it's been a long couple of weeks at my house.

But, I'm still looking on the positive side and am demanding things get better pronto! lol We leave for vacation next Friday, so I hope that'll be restful and relaxing and hopefully I can forget all my worries. I'll make sure to schedule some blogs to post so that there will be something here on Saturday's while I'm gone.

A couple of weeks ago I submitted my book, A Kiss of Wytch Blood, which is a dark paranormal romance involving an all powerful wytch and a vampire that's hiding some huge secrets about his own powers. No word back on it yet, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed. Like I said, I'm staying positive. ;-)

*CONTEST* As a celebration of summer, I'm giving away a tote bag (beach bag) at Moonlight, Lace & Mayhem. I encourage all of you to enter for a chance to win because this celebration is for both sites and is for both of our readers/followers. A picture of the bag is posted at Moonlight, Lace & Mayhem if you're interested. It's open to all US residents and to enter all you have to do is leave me a comment. Leave the comment at Moonlight, Lace & Mayhem or it won't count. I'll announce the winner on Sunday (tomorrow), so be sure to leave a comment there if you're interested in a chance to win.

I hope everyone has a fabulous weekend and again I'm sorry for ditching you guys for a couple of weeks. ~huggles~

What We Can Learn From...

Okay, let me talk about something a lot of you may find 'cringe-worthy' If you are not interested in male/male love then please don't read any further. Cool?


Here we go then:


So, as all of you who know I write male/male romance, have done since I was first published. A lot of you may be thinking what's the appeal of two men showing each other their affection. Well, to put it simply, the answer is just that. Men showing affection/emotion. Something a lot of women want from their man but just don't get it because he's too macho or some shit like that. What's wrong with a man just hugging someone for the sake of it? What's wrong with a man kissing his son to show him how proud he is? What's wrong with a man doing chores around the house to let his wife know that he sees her as an equal? Nothing. That's what.

Actually, even gay p*rn is completely different to straight p*rn in the way that when the men 'do it' there is lots of kissing, hugging and affection shown toward each other (unless the purpose of the video/pictures are for a different nature, like master/slave stuff). I admire gay p*rn in a way that it's in complete contrast to most straight stuff where the woman is an object. Why should a woman be an object? Why can't a man kiss her like they do in the gay films? In fact, a lot of people in the straight community could learn a lot from what the gay community get up to.

Writing male/male romance is such a joy because I get to see the inner side of what makes a man. Being a man myself I know that we are emotional creatures contrary to popular belief and cultural barriers that have been built up since we climbed down from the trees. One famous saying goes: "You make love to a woman and you have sex with a man". I can't remember who said that, but suffice it to say, I disagree. I think that no matter who you're with, you make love to them. Kiss them...a lot. Treat them as equal. Treat them how you would like to be treated. You'll go far :-)

Oh, and watch some gay p*rn. You may be surprised.

Research Rocks!

I'd love to hear about your research. I love doing research for my books. I had a blast reading about the Havasupai Indians who live at the bottom of The Grand Canyon while writing Canyon Wolf Bride. While writing The Wooden Nickel, I researched the rail riders of The Great Depression, the young boys and men who hopped trains in search in work, the bulls they dealt with (railroad guards) and the every day dangers. While writing A Love Beyond Time for the Muse Series, I researched The Renaissance and The Salem Witch Trials for my time travel romance. For Uncaged, I researched London in the 1700's and the slave trade in Africa. Research for Voodoo Moon was personal. I traveled to Montego Bay, Jamaica and walked the halls of Rosehall Plantation where Annie Palmer still roams today. Seeing her grave, the infamous dungeon (which is now a bar) where she kept ill tempered slaves and her bedroom where she slept and bedded the men she killed...wow...it really brought my story to life. Now I'm researching Circle City, Alaska, a town on the edge of civilization, a stone's throw from desolation. The perfect setting for a clan of wolf people. Don't ya think?

What are you researching now? I'd love to hear. Research is like going back to school but only taking the classes you really love!

Have a great Tuesday!
~Alisha

(Photo courtesy of photobucket.com)

A Lesson on Waiting

It's not a major deal, or even one to make the world shudder to a stop. It was more a little hiccup or perhaps a burp along the highway of life. Yeah, more of an inconvenience.

Yesterday, I decided I wanted to buy a new workout DVD collection. It's one I'd been eying for a while and pricing, salivating over, so with all our tax checks arrived and in the bank, I thought, all right time to do something nice for me. It's not that expensive and it's kind of an intermediate step to the DVD's my hubby and I tried last summer (the ones that kicked our asses royal). I thought it might be a good thing to try them and work back up to the ones from last summer. It was a plan anyhow. So, when I went to the company's website to order, I did everything it asked of me, all the pages loaded properly and then I hit the very last button - you know -the one right before the screen pops up to say, "congratulations you have successfully purchased...." Well, the I got an error message saying my cart was empty and that the URL had switched to another site. It gave me hyperlinks to press, which all took me back to the same page. All right. I'll play along. I went to press the order form....nadda. Same error message. I tried the company's other products. Nope. Nothin' doin'. Their entire shopping cart had crashed.

All right, I'm a big girl. I realize glitches happen, so I'm not too upset. I go to my email to make sure there isn't a purchase confirmation email. Nope. Not even the first one. I check back in 20 minutes. Still none. So, I'm thinking the order didn't go through. I'm good with that. I'll just go elsewhere to order the product.

Enter ebay.

I find the product I wanted for about a third of the price. Still in box. Brand new. I show my hubby the listing. It's a Buy It Now so I don't even have to wait for the auction to end to get this fabulous price. (Really, if you're shopping on ebay and don't want to mess with the auction and find something you want at a reasonable price, this is really the way to go.) - So, hubster tells me to go ahead and buy it. I do. Get the confirmation from paypal and all is well with the world. I also find another series of dance workout DVD's to get for 20 bucks, which will come in handy while I'm recouperating from surgery. (Yes, I have to have surgery in July. Carpel Tunnel in my left arm. ugh.) - I buy the dance workouts and all is right with the world.

Until I'm at work.

I check my email to see if my ebay purchases have confirmation of reciept of payment from the sellers. What do you think I find instead? If you guessed a confirmation of order from the site that crashed, you'd be correct.

Ughhhhhhh.....

Now, to fix this problem requires either my husband or I to call their customer service line precisely at 11am EST, (they open at 8am Pac) to cancel this order. Again, not a big deal, just annoying. Because now I have two of the same product coming to me, and one is about 3 times more expensive. If I had just waited 24 hours, I wouldn't have been calling my hubby to see what he could do before our credit card got charged.

But on the other hand, if the cart hadn't crashed I might not have found the product so much cheaper. Or the cheap dance workout DVDs. Silver linings for all!

And I learned a lesson: Don't be so hot to buy something without shopping around really well first.

(You'd think I'd have known that after last week's netbook buying fiasco -but that's another story.)

Rock on,

-Kate